Another nonstory, but great comments!
Althouse commenters have a Bulwer-Lytton contest.
My vote goes to:
The cool mist of the morning passed over the hood of his car like Cool Whip over a Jello dish at a Methodist Ladies Wednesday Night dinner meeting. It briefly wrapped his car in a sheath of mystery, an enigma as puzzling as the current situation and the surprise eggroll on his lunch plate the day before.
It was a difficult decision, but the correctness, the absolute perfection of the prose engulfed me as a gentle burning burp reminded me of the Ziti Surprise the strangely dressed and oddly smelling Sinners for Scratch were selling to raise funds for the Karl Rove Did It Memorial.
ohnevermind...
